I can't run anyone else's race or judge my progress based off of others accomplishments or failures. I have friends who have done great things, and friends who have done terrible things, but at the end of the day I set my own goals, while remaining cognizant of the world around me. I'm more observant of others actions than I've ever been in my life and I've begun to notice a few blatant things.
People claim to want honesty, but they don't. They claim to want bluntness, but they don't. As soon as someone responds in a way they don't agree with or are ready for, they deem you as an asshole, a jerk; but never an organically honest person. If the truth is always in your favor, congratulations on living a life in which everyone will lie to you. I refuse to anger myself or become angry with another person due to their reaction to something I said. There are these things called opinions and with these opinions, people are entitled to believe and react however they want. So, I observe things and comment and people tend to be surprised by how I feel. "The mirror is extremely revealing," and honest, apologies for the way you feel about my version of honesty and truth.
I feel bad for the guys who still find it necessary to lie to women to achieve some end. I've lied and omitted things in the past and to those few, there are not enough apologies in the world. Perhaps it was the culture I surrounded myself with, maybe it was some dire need to play the game the best; whatever the case, it was childish and a total facade to the true reality of things. These days I'm cognizant of others reactions, but I'm honest with my own admissions.
I'm 25, which means I've met a ton of people throughout my life; as such, there are things in the past which may have been totally unnecessary, but an experience nonetheless. Of course, the infamous thought of "her" plagues the recesses of my mind, but the majority of the time when I go to a bar, I'm not thinking to myself, "this scantily clad woman drinking all the liquor I just bought is going to be my wife," its just not something that crosses my head. Not to take away from that way of life at all, as it is, after all another experience which help shape people; however it kills me when women with these delusions of grandeur truly believe I spent my whole life looking for them and just so happened to run into my future in some bar.
Honestly, I know my worth and I didn't learn the value of myself dealing with women. It was an innate sense of self, and although things have changed a bit, there will never be a time when I tell someone, "I deserve..." The implications of such a statement are endless as they make me wonder what happened previous to the current situation that taught you, "your worth."
Honesty and an occasional smile to a random person; it plays.
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